Archive for the ‘I Love Joss’ Category

« Older Entries
1 Comment

X Factor


Apr
27.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, Books, I Love Joss, Random, Television | 1 Comment »

Today’s post is devoted to those favorite things of mine that I wanted to mention earlier this month but didn’t because either other things popped into my head at the last minute or Joss Whedon trumps all.  I’m calling it “X Factor” because (a) it’s X Day and (b) because these things (All right, well one’s a person) have completely captured my attention/imagination in a way that’s usually only reserved for the Whedonverse.

Books

I first read the novels of Ellen Emerson White when I was in the seventh grade and both my mother and my English teacher were desperate to get me to read something— anything— that didn’t feature a pair of beautiful blond twins. So, one day, when I was wandering around the library searching for said anything, I came across The President’s Daughter.  It’s the story of Meg Powers (one of my all time favorite characters)
, a sixteen year old girl whose mother runs for (and wins) the Presidency of the United States.  I don’t remember why exactly I picked it up but I’m super glad I did because it was the start of a beautiful love affair— all right, maybe a little one sided love affair— that has lasted until this day.  And just so you understand how long I’ve been in love with this book/series, it’s been quite a while since I was in the seventh grade.  Like, more than one decade.  And then some.

Ellen Emerson White taught me so much about writing a story. She taught me so much about creating a character with layers.  She taught me so much about character voice.  My writing changed forever after reading these series of books.  And if you like YA, you should most definitely read this series.

Here’s the series list in order:

1.  The President’s Daughter (which is currently a paperback bargain at Amazon— $4!!)

2.  White House Autumn

3.  Long Live The Queen

4.  Long May She Reign

I also love White’s other novels The Road Home, Life Without Friends, and In Case of Emergency, Ring Super.  These three titles are out of print and therefore, harder to come by but they’re fantastic novels all.

Television

Sherlock is a British series that offers a contemporary spin on the Sherlock Holmes stories.  I started watching it this year (just a couple months ago) and was addicted probably within the first ten minutes because it’s that awesome.  I was very disappointed to find out there were only three episodes though.  Fortunately, the next series starts up in the States on May 6th.  And BOY am I excited.

Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock) and Martin Freeman (Watson) are terrific.  The writing rocks and the mysteries are good ones.  (Even if, between A Study In Pink and a certain episode of the British series Luther, I am now afraid of London cab drivers…)

Here are some of my favorite lines from the first series:

Mycroft:  You don’t seem very afraid.
Watson: You don’t seem very frightening.

Sherlock:  Anderson, don’t talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the entire street.

Sherlock:  I’m not a psychopath, Anderson. I’m a high functioning sociopath. Do your research.

Sherlock:  Look at you lot. You’re all so vacant. Is it nice being me? It must be so relaxing.

Watson: (shouting while pissed at Sherlock) I’m Sherlock Holmes and I always work alone because no-one can compete with my massive intellect!

Comics

And just for something different and for something that actually starts with X, I’d like to make mention of XKCD, a comic strip featuring stick figures and geek humor (I guess, lacking a better way to describe it).  A lot of the strips, I don’t understand because a lot of it is science centered and my level of science understands tops out at Mr. Wizard (or Bill Nye the Science Guy for those of you too young to know who Mr. Wizard is).  Apparently, I’m not the only one who feels this way because there’s a site called Explain XKCD that does just day: explains the comic to the rest of us.

But my favorite comic from them is this one:

No Comments

Whedon


Apr
26.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, I Love Joss, Movies, Music, Television | No Comments »

You may picked up on this by now but I am completely slightly— very, very slightly— obsessed with Joss Whedon.  I wrote about him on W day last year too and about a million times since.  Well, all right, not a million in the strictest sense of the word but a lot.  I wrote about him a lot.  I write about him a lot.

But only because he’s awesome.

A lot of this is going to sound exactly what I wrote last year but I can’t help it.  I love what this man does with story.  I love how in a single 42 minute episode of something, he can make you laugh and then pull the rug out from under you and make you sob.  I love that his writing is fearless and even though you might hate him for it, he’ll kill not only his darlings but yours as well (RIP, Wash…).  I love that he’s written so many kick ass female characters.  I love that he wrote a musical episode of Buffy.  I love that he wrote a near silent episode of Buffy (for which he  won an Emmy).  I love that the Buffy season five episode, The Body, makes me cry every damn time I watch it.  I love that he created freaking Firefly, for crying out loud.  And I love that during the writers’ strike, he created Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog (available for instant viewing on Netflix…).  And then for the DVD release of Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog, he wrote a musical commentary to go along with it.  How freaking awesome is that?

I went to see The Cabin in the Woods opening weekend because of Joss’s involvement and I hate horror movies.  Granted, I spent a fair amount of time with my eyes closed and my hands covering my face but I still appreciated the hell out of the writing.  I’m planning to see The Avengers (along with the rest of the world) come May 4th because Joss Whedon directed it (and also because Chris Hemsworth is kinda hot).

Joss Is Boss.  And if you looked at my Facebook profile, you’d see that my religion is listed as W.W.J.W.D?

Here are some of my favorite Joss quotes:

“Always remember to be yourself. Unless you suck.”

“Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don’t forget food. You can go a week without laughing.”

“Write it. Shoot it. Publish it. Crochet it, sauté it, whatever. MAKE.”

“I write to give myself strength. I write to be the characters that I am not. I write to explore all the things I’m afraid of. ”

To leave you with today, I’m going to post a couple of videos.  The first is an excerpt from the aforementioned Commentary! The Musical from the Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog commentary track. It’s Joss’s song, “Heart, Broken”:

And finally, I’m going to share this gem I stumbled across on YouTube. It’s a parody of the Ballad of Jayne (The Hero of Canton) done by The Bedlam Bards, a group who perhaps worships Joss Whedon and the Firefly universe even more than I do. They have a couple of Firefly inspired albums out. The first is called “On the Drift” and the other “Firefly Drinking Songs.”  The video below is the first selection on the “On The Drift” album.

Enjoy…

No Comments

Undead and Lovin’ It


Apr
24.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, I Love Joss, Movies, Television | No Comments »

Today we’re talking about Vampires.  And by that I mean real vampires. Not the sparkly kind. (Although a certain sparkly vampire will make an appearance at the end of this post.)  If I leave out your favorites, make sure to mention them below!

1.  Nosferatu

Holy crap, this is one creepy dude.  He’s the title character of a 1922 German silent movie with a pretty jazzy soundtrack.  In the film, Count Orlok (aka Nosferatu) terrorizes Transylvania until that gets boring and then ships himself in a coffin over to the fictitious German city of Wisborg where the resumes his habit of eating people.  He also watches from a window as his pure of heart next door neighbor, Ellen, sleeps.

See, Edward. It’s creepy.

Ellen reads a book all about vampires that her husband brought home from oversea travels to Transylvania and learns the way to kill a vampire is for a pure of heart woman to distract the vampire with her beauty all night long so he forgets to return to his hideaway when the dawn comes. So Ellen does as the book describes. Orlok comes through her window, drinks her blood and stays there all night long. He forgets about dawn and vanishes in a puff of smoke.  Ellen lives just long enough for one last loving embrace with her husband.  And Nosferatu is never heard from again… or is he?

2.  Eric Northman from True Blood.  I can never decide if I love this show or hate this show but since I can’t stop watching it (no matter now disgusting it gets… and it gets pretty damn disgusting), I guess it doesn’t matter.  At any rate, Eric Northman is pretty damn easy on the eyes.


3.  The Salvatore Brothers from The Vampire Diaries.  I should probably be embarrassed by how frakking obsessed with this show I am but then Damn takes his shirt off and I completely forget.  My favorite line comes from Damon when he says, “I do believe in killing the messenger. You know why? Because it sends a message.”  The vampires on this show can walk in the sun but they only think they sparkle with is genius. Very few shows can pack as much action and angst into each and every episode.



4.  The Vamps from the Whedonverse.  I saved this group for last because (a) there are so many of them and (b) they rock.  There’s Angel and Angelus, Spike and Drusilla, Darla, even Harmony and let’s not forget Vampire Willow and Vampire Xander.  They’re good, they’re bad, they’re human, they’re soulless, they’re soulful (?), they’ve been sent to hell and they’ve come back…where they stop, nobody knows!

Well, that’s gonna to do it for me today. I have a line of post-it notes requiring my attention. But before I disappear, here’s that Edward Cullen cameo I teased in the opening paragraph:

No Comments

Kicking Ass


Apr
12.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, Blogfests, I Love Joss, Television | No Comments »

I like kicking ass. Of course, the only thing I really kick ass at is demolishing a box of Little Debbie snack cakes and I’m currently getting my ass kicked by this spring flu so maybe I should say I like the concept of kicking ass. As such, I like characters who kick ass, especially female characters who kick ass because I find them much more interesting than a female character who’s all, “Oh, where is my big strong man to rescue me and take care of me for I am a damsel in distress and incapable of making my own decisions!”

Or whatever.

So today’s post is devoted to those kick ass (television) characters. There are several such characters on my list (yay!) so, in the interest of time, I won’t feature them all (and I apologize in advance for the wonky formatting). But here’s a sampling (and thanks to the brilliant Random Danni for inspiring today’s format):

River Tam

Show: Firefly (and the Big Damn Movie Serenity)

Portrayed by: Summer Glau

History: Traumatized psychic genius teenager once tortured by evil government regime to become a very powerful killing machine. Kicks everyone’s ass in the Big Damn Movie, including the Hero of Canton. I know, right?

Favorite line: Also, I can kill you with my brain.

(more…)

2 comments

Horribly Happy Hodgepodge


Apr
09.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, Blogfests, I Love Joss, Music, Television | 2 Comments »

Good morning, world, and welcome back to the A to Z Challenge as it moves into its second week.  I hope everyone had a lovely holiday weekend and that no one’s sugar hangover is too terribly great.  I had a surprisingly lack of sugar intake going on yesterday so I am more than ready to share with you another list of my favorite H things.

Here we go…

Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog

Yep.  I wrote about it last year and I even mentioned it last week when I talked about Captain Hammer.  And chances are it’ll come up again on Wednesday when I talk about the person I am most likely to one day stalk (unless there are like, law enforcement type people reading this. Then I won’t stalk anyone. Ever. Promise.).

Dr. Horrible, played by the impossibly adorable Neil Patrick Harris, is just a evil genius trying to take over the world.  “The world’s a mess,” he says, “and I just need to rule it.”  He also would like to gain the affection of his laundry buddy (that’s right. The evil genius has to go the laundromat), Penny, a do-gooder who’s just trying to help the homeless.  Standing in his way of achieving both these goals is Captain Hammer, Corporate Tool.  I talked about him last Thursday.  The humor is fantastic and the songs are super.  And I really wish there was Dr. Horrible to be had.

Because the bottom line is, Dr. Horrible makes me incredibly happy.  Whenever I’m having a crappy day, all I have to do is pop in my DVD and voila! My mood has been presto changed-o into something far more cheery.  I even downloaded a copy from iTunes to put on my iPod so I could watch it at The Store.  I’m pretty sure most of the staff can now sing along with Dr. Horrible.  All I can say to that is… co-workers, you’re welcome.

Happy Endings

I was introduced to this sitcom found on ABC last year by my brother and sister-in-law.  It didn’t take long for me to fall head over heels in love with it.  I find it to be so damn funny.  Sure, not every joke lands but that holds true for every sitcom out there.  I have a habit of scribbling down lines that makes me laugh in my notebook and lately most of those scribbles are courtesy of the Happy Endings writing team.

And the best part is, it’s one of those rare shows that both The Man and I enjoy so it’s something we can watch together.  Awww, sweet, right?  Right.

Next up…

Halestorm

Halestorm is a rock band out of Pennsylvania.  Again, I was introduced to them by my brother and sister-in-law who apparently know exactly what I will like.  They saw this band in concert a while back and heard the song below.  My sister-in-law looked at my brother then and said, “we have to get this CD for M.J.”   So thanks for that because I do love this song… and the entire album for that matter.

Heavy In Your Arms

Last but not least is this song by Florence + The Machine.  The first time I heard, I feel deeply in love with and it remains to this day at the very top of my favorite songs of all time list.  This is a hard feat because I am forever searching out new music and no song has held on to the #1 spot as long as this one has.  I think probably because it’s such a perfect song for the love stories in my book.  Spoiler Alert: I don’t do happy endings. Often.

No Comments

Firefly


Apr
06.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, Blogfests, I Love Joss, Television | No Comments »

Last night on a mildly entertaining episode of The Big Bang Theory (Sorry, apart from the very beginning and the very end, it wasn’t really that special), we learned that Sheldon Cooper had only begged three times in his life. The first time was to beg Fox NOT to cancel Firefly. If I didn’t already love Sheldon Cooper, I would have loved him in that moment because if there ever was a show that shouldn’t have been cancelled, it’s Firefly.

And yeah, I know, you’re probably saying to yourself, “Hey, didn’t you blog about Firefly this time last year? And you know, every other damn day you could work it into a post?” And the answer is Yes. Yes, I did. Because I am obsessed with this show. All right, fine, I am more than obsessed with this show. Because it is awesome. Which means that yes, on F Day next year in the A to Z Challenge, I’ll talk about it again. Because it’s that awesome.

And possibly because my interests are that narrow. But did I mention how awesome it is?

So anyway, last year, I posted my top five episodes so this year I thought I might post three more.

1. Shindig. Written by Joss Whedon and Jane Espenson. Mal and Kaylee attend a planet’s social event of the year in order to secure work. While there, they run into Inara and her client, Atherton Wing. Hijinks ensue and it ends with a sword fight. Awe. Some.

Highlights:

Wash: You want a slinky dress? I can buy you a slinky dress. Captain, can I have money for a slinky dress?

Kaylee calling Mal “Captain Tightpants” and later being the center of attention at the ball, talking engines with all the guys

River’s dressing down of Badger and the group’s open mouthed reaction to said dressing down.

Mal: ‘Kay, help me find our man. He’s supposed to be older, kind of stocky, wears a red sash crossways.
Kaylee: Why does he do that?
Mal: Maybe he won the Miss Persephone pageant. Just help me look.
Kaylee: Is that him?
Mal: That’s the buffet table.
Kaylee: Well, how can we be sure, u-unless we question it?
Mal: You know, they say mercy is the mark of a great man.
[stabs Atherton]
Mal: Guess I’m just a good man.
[stabs him again]
Mal: Well, I’m all right.

2. Safe. Written by Drew Greenberg

The episode following “Shindig” in which Shepherd Book is shot when a deal goes sour while River and Simon are kidnapped by hillfolk who just happen to need a doctor. And some perspective. After all, they do try to burn River at the stake for being a witch. She’s not a witch. She’s just a crazy psychic who has the ability to kill you with her pinky. Get with the times, hillfolk.

Highlights:

Mal: Looks like we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoe: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain’t we just.

and this video:

3. Ariel. Written by Jose Molina

Simon hires the crew to help him break into the diagnostic lab in a central planet’s hospital so he can figure out what the Alliance did to River. Jayne makes a plan to turn the fugitives in. As always, chaos ensues.

Highlights:

The scene were Mal, Zoe and Jayne are trying to learn their paramedic lines. Hysterical. I looked for a video of this scene but there isn’t one. Sad.

This scene (one of my favorite in the entire frakking series) that taught us that you do not frak with Captain Tightpants:


What are you favorite Firefly moments? Please tell me! I can’t wait to find out!

No Comments

Evil Is As Evil Does


Apr
05.12

Posted in A to Z Challenge, Blogfests, I Love Joss, Television | No Comments »

Today’s post is devoted to some of my favorite villains.  In the interest of time, I’m sticking to television and movie villains because it’s my blog and I can do that if I want to.  (Plus, these villains get all the best YouTube clips…)

Villains are awesome.  They teach us so much.  For example, what not to do with secret agents.  If you capture a James Bond type , you’re much better off just shooting him in the head rather than dangling him over a pool filled with sharks wearing lasers on their heads.

Because that never ends well.  James Bond always gets away.

But mostly what I take away from my villains is this simple life lesson:  perseverance.  (Because the truth is, I very seldom have to deal with secret agents in any way, shape or form).  They teach us to never give up.  Some inconsiderate hero comes along and ruins your carefully devised plans?  You go ahead and make a new one.

Every single night, Pinky asks the Brain “What are we going to do tonight?” and Brain always answers, “The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.”

And every single time, they’re unsuccessful but every single outing ends with Pinky saying, “What are we going to do tomorrow night?” And every single time Brain answers, “the same thing we do every night, Pinky.  Try to take over the world.”

Insert deep well written life lesson here.  Blah, blah, blah… don’t give up.  Never give in!  Never surrender!  Whatever.  Here are some of my other favorite villains:

Skeletor

Yes, from He-Man.  The original cartoon series, not the newer ones.  He was always the skeleton with a plan and an insult.  He never missed an opportunity to try and take over Eternia and call He-Man (0r his own henchmen) names while doing it.  Plus, in the He-Man And She-Ra Christmas Special (yes, Virginia, there really is such a thing and it is the most awesome Christmas special ever), he saved a puppy (and, fine, two children) while learning about the meaning of Christmas.  And then went right back to trying to take over the world the next day…

Dr. Doofenschmirtz

From Phineas and Ferb.  While I find the Phineas and Ferb parts of the story fun, it’s really the Dr. Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus portion of each half hour that keep me coming back to this totally delightful (even though I have no children) cartoon.  He’s a classic mad scientist, an evil genius hiding out in his evil lair (you know, the big skyscraper with his name in giant letters on the side), with his own jingle.  (That’s really what evil villain needs, you know.  A jingle.)   Every single episode, he has a new “-inator”, for example the “destruct-inator” that he planned to use to destroy everyone’s garden gnomes.  Then there’s my personal favorite the “Turn Everything Evil- Inator” which he hoped to use to well, turn everything evil.  Of course it never works but that never prevents Heinz Doofenshmirtz from coming up with another new -Inator.

And Last But Certainly Not Least…

Captain Hammer

(with a special honorable mention to Bad Horse the Thoroughbred of Sin, Fake Thomas Jefferson and the rest of the Evil League of Evil)

From Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog.  If you don’t know what that is, I’m not sure we can be friends anymore.  But I tell you what… if you go watch it on YouTube right this moment, I’ll forgive you.  Probably.

Oh, Captain Hammer.  How do I love thee?  Yes, I know you’re technically the hero of the piece but let’s face it.  You’re a corporate tool.  And you also break my villains never say die rule because the last we see you, you’re sobbing on your therapist’s couch while Dr. Horrible runs rampant over the city.  Dammit, Captain Hammer!  I can’t count on you for anything!!

Except a laugh. In the following clip, he delivers what is really quite possibly the greatest line ever written:

My God, I love Joss Whedon. But that’s a post for next week.

Now it’s your turn: Who are your favorite villains?  Tell me below (even if they come from books…).

No Comments

21 Questions


Feb
20.12

Posted in Books, I Love Joss, Music, Random | No Comments »

The latest craze sweeping the blogosphere is this question and answer thing where you are tagged and asked to answer ten or eleven questions.  Well, this weekend I was tagged twice.  Once by Ava Quinn over at Tongue In Cheek (a wonderfully hilarious blog you should check out if you haven’t already) and once by Jessica Salyer at Just Following A Dream.  These questions combined number 21, hence my very clever title. Here are my answers to their questions:

Ava’s Questions:

1.  When is your favorite time to write?

My favorite time to write is at night, after all other mammals in my household are asleep.  That’s when I can barricade myself in my office and break out the weaponry.  Both literal and figurative.

2.  What would you like to change about the place where you write?

I’d like it to be located in some fabulous oceanfront home on Mount Desert Island in Maine.  Other than that, I’d say I need more bookshelf space.

3.  Who is your favorite villain?

My favorite villain is Dr. Horrible.  Running a close second is Dr. Doofenschmirtz.  I also have a soft spot for Skeletor.

4.  Which do you prefer?  Mel Brooks’ movies or Monty Python’s?

Ava mentioned she thought this was the toughest question and I think she might be right but I have to go with Monty Python because Monty Python and the Holy Grail is on my top ten list of all time favorite movies.

5.  Who is your favorite character from The Princess Bride?

The second toughest question.  I have debated on this question for a while (a very long time) and have decided to go with Fezzik.

6.  If you could meet anyone living today, who would it be?

Joss Whedon.  Next question.

7.  What is your favorite dish that your mom used to make for you?

I am the quintessential picky eater and so my favorite meal growing up (and still today) was dubbed the yellow meal.  It was homemade macaroni and cheese, corn and cornbread.  It bored every other member of my family.

8.  What song are you really into right now?

Right now, I am really into the song Come Back Home by Chris Pureka.  The lyrics are lovely.

9.  If you had a kickass Halloween party to go to and you had unlimited resources to prepare, what would you go as?

I don’t know exactly.  But assuming I’d also have the unlimited confidence to pull it off, I’d say some kind of medieval-esque celtic warrior woman.  But let’s face it… it would really be an excuse to procure myself some kick ass weaponry.

10.  Who from your past would you Facebook stalk but never want to see in real life?

I guess an ex-boyfriend or two but other than that, I really don’t know.

(more…)

No Comments

The Hat They Call Jayne’s


Dec
29.11

Posted in I Love Joss, Random | No Comments »

Well, hello world.

I know I’ve been a terrible blogger of late.  Lazy and remiss.   I have excuses, of course.  There’s the typical holiday hijinks (unfortunately, gifts never do buy themselves) and some last minute unplanned shifts at The Store (some days, being the only associate capable of performing certain tasks is a blessing.  Other times, not so much) and a bronchitis-esque cold that took a detour into laryngitis land (which was nice.  It gave me a chance to brush up on my miming skills…).  Then there was that whole computer virus my desktop caught that shut me down for a few days while The Man sorted it all out.

But I’m back now and virus free.

I hope everyone had a pleasant holiday season.  I did.  And I’m not going to lie.  The highlight for me came early Christmas morning, wrapped in a sheet of tissue paper.  Inside was contained a hat that, when worn, would tell all passers-by that the wearer isn’t afraid of anything.

I refer, of course, to the hat they call Jayne’s…

This picture was taken by The Man with some fancy smancy app he downloaded for his smart phone. Pretty cunning, huh?

I haven’t much taken it off since.  I’m wearing it now, as a matter of fact.  And it’s awesome.
Oh, and I have some good news… some time after the holidays, my mother has agreed to make another Jayne hat.  That hat will be used as My Pet Blog’s very first giveaway.  I have no idea when this will take place but please, stay tuned…

2 comments

Yarn Yarn


Dec
13.11

Posted in I Love Joss, Television | 2 Comments »

Welcome to Part Two of my Undomestic Goddess series.  Today’s installment is subtitled “In Which I Go to the Craft Store.”

Let’s begin.

I don’t know if you know this about me but I am a huge Joss Whedon fan and ever since 2002, I have been obsessed with dedicated to the best gorram space western to ever be unfairly cancelled by a group of really stupid Fox network executives.

So now you might be wondering what exactly Firefly has to do with a trip to the craft store.     I like to think if you’re as obsessive dedicated a fan as I happen to be, you might already know and you might already be tingling with excitement.  But, in case you aren’t…

This year for Christmas, my mother is making for me a Jayne hat (as seen in the previously unaired episode “The Message”).  If you don’t know what the Jayne hat is, here’s a picture:

Pretty cunnin', don't you think?

Of course, my mother had no idea what a Jayne hat was or why just saying the phrase ‘Jayne hat’ made me jump up and down, clapping my hands with glee while giggling like someone who’s been into the nitrous oxide.  But because it made me jump up and down, clapping my hands with glee while giggling like someone who’s been into the nitrous oxide, she agreed to make me one (and mittens to match.  Yes, I know Jayne didn’t get matching mittens but my mother makes some seriously kick ass mittens.  You’d be stupid not to want a pair).

All I had to do was get her the pattern and pick out the yarn.

Hence the trip to the craft store.

And as you know, I live in the Mount Washington Valley where outlets are plentiful but craft stores are not.  So I headed off to Large Mart to buy yarn.  The pattern calls for three skeins of three different colors.  Large Mart only had two of the colors.  But I picked up three skeins each.  One for my hat, one for my niece Jupiter’s hat (who decided she wanted a Jayne hat when I told her about them because Jupiter is the coolest kid ever on the face of the anywhere) and one for the mittens.  Here’s the conversation I had with the cashier:

Him:  Wow.  Look at all this yarn.  What are you making?
Me:  Me?  Nothing.
Him:  What’s with the yarn then?
Me:  Oh, my mother knits and she’s knitting me a hat for Christmas.
Him:  It takes this much yarn to knit a hat?
Me:  I don’t know.  No.  Yes?  Maybe?  She’s making more than one hat.  And mittens.
Him:  Oh.  Well, won’t that be nice.

A couple days later, I drove an hour and a half to the closest craft  store to pick out the missing color.  I don’t do well in craft stores.  I don’t really feel comfortable there.  I’m very out of place and I think the employees can tell that just by looking at me.  I always feel like the second I walk through the door some kind of intruder alarm will go off because I don’t sew.  I don’t knit.  I don’t crochet.  I don’t quilt.  I don’t arrange flowers.  I don’t scrap book.  I don’t paint or draw.  I don’t really do anything that would necessitate a trip to the craft store so I only go there if I have a very specific list written out for me by someone else… kind of like when I send The Man to the grocery store with a list that says “buy the jug of milk with the light blue cap.”

The Jayne Hat pattern told me exactly what I needed so I was able to pick out the three skeins of the missing color and then, because there was a yarn sale going on and they had so many interesting colors (so much more than Large Mart),  I picked out some other colors because hey, I love hats and I really need a solid navy hat.  And maybe a green one too.  And oh look!  That teal is really nice.  And maybe that purple too…

When I was finished, I took my basket full of yarn (and I do mean full) and proceeded to the cash registers.  Now this next thing doesn’t really relate to my yarn yarn but I just want to say that that store was chock full of screaming kids.  There were kids everywhere all screaming and running up to their mothers with something in their hands saying, “Mom! Can I buy this?” and then when she said no, they’d run away, find something new, run back and scream, “How about this? Can I buy this?”  I know I must have been the same way when I was a kid (and god bless my mother for having four of us and living to tell the tale) but WOW, was it scary.  And annoying.  It made me glad that my kids are the furry four legged variety and when I bring them into a store (many of the stores in the MWV are dog friendly), they do not run around screaming and asking to buy things.

Wow.  Just wow.

The mother (of four screaming and skulking children) in front of me took pity of me and the look of absolute terror on my face and let me go ahead of her in line.  That’s when I had the following conversation with the cashier:

Her:  Oooh!  And what will you be making?
Me:  A dent in my credit card?

After I escaped the craft store with my second rather large bag of yarn, I drove out to my mother’s house to drop off everything.  My sister was there.  Here’s the conversation I had with her:

Her:  What’s with the yarn?
Me:  Mom’s making me a Jayne hat.
Her:  How much yarn do you think it takes to make a hat?
Me:  She’s making me mittens too.
Her:  Uh huh.

I was starting to feel like Diane Keaton’s character in the 1987 movie Baby Boom.  Have you ever seen that one?  If you haven’t, you should.  It’s pretty good.  Anyway, this city dwelling career woman who has just moved out to the country decides to pick apples to bake a pie.  They show her on a ladder just having filled one basket with apples.  She says, “I think that’s enough for a pie” and the camera pans away to reveal a massive numbers of baskets on the ground all overflowing with apples.

My family’s had a jolly good laugh at the influx of yarn in the household.  Especially my mother who, when she came home that evening, looking at the sea of yarn and said, “What is all this?”

But you know what?  I will take whatever teasing and ribbing they want to send my way because pretty soon I am going to have a hat that, when I walk down the street wearing it, people will know I am not afraid of anything.

Damn straight.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I suddenly have this overwhelming urge to have a Firefly viewing marathon.

Have a shiny day.

« Older Entries